On Women Temperament: Jealously and Self-love

Our contemporary venerable elder Paisios once said to a group of women monastics:

When one keeps himself away from futile things, his thoughts automatically turn to God. It has been easier for women to try to please God, because of their sensitive hearts, than it has been for men, who are rational thinkers. Led by their feelings, women proceeded to Golgotha and to the Holy Sepulchre, while the men hid themselves away.

But women can be in danger of wasting their emotions on small, vain things.

It is easy to give your heart to small vanities, such that there is nothing left over for Christ. You can easily not be satisfied with the simple necessities, and desire instead those things which are beautiful, ornate, and pleasant. You would thus prefer a little flower to be painted on a glass, a tablecloth embroidered, chairs to be carved, and so forth. In this way the heart is dispersed. Do not waste your heart foolishly. Women in their practical daily lives love such fine detail, just as they do in their spiritual lives also; but wast- ing their energies on the fine details in the practical realm allows Satan to do his own meticulous destructive work. Do not attach yourselves to ephemeral things, but only to God. Do not become lost in the sea of detail; rather, simplify your spiritual struggle first, and do not despair. After your large passions are cut off, the small ones will disappear also. Do not dwell on your past life and your childhood transgressions, for new opportunities are available for all. Always give praise and thanks to God; ingratitude is the worse sin of all, and the worse sinner is an ungrateful one.

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Father Paisios also said: "Women are full of love. But Satan can poison that love and turn it to eiwy. \Vomt\\ cat\ love themselves excessively; such love creates suffering, and it becomes a torment. Without such self-love, one turns to Christ and thus can love everyone."

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And he said: "A jealous man avoids the person he envies. A jealous woman cannot rest until her adversary is totally wiped out."

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Father Paisios also said that "Underneath human adversity, God's harmony is hidden. For example, in a marriage two totally different personalities can experience harmony. Thus women with their emotional wealth can bring men nearer to God."